Solving For Joy

Dr. Shideh Shafie (cold open):
The pursuit of joy—it’s a beautiful thing. We should pursue joy. The work we do as physicians is really meaningful. But can you do some of that meaningful work in the right dose—so the toxicity doesn’t break your heart too much—and you can still have joy?

Chrissie Ott (cold open):
I’m not on somebody else’s path. I’m just trying to be truest in this moment. And now what? And now what? And now what? Let that be a living thing, because you don’t get to know the end—you only get to know the part you’re in and the part you’ve been.

Dr. Shideh Shafie (cold open):
Excitement takes a lot of work. It’s very fleeting. Happiness can be fleeting too—momentary. But serenity and peace don’t take as much energy, and you can feel them for long periods. You can meditate in them, and it’s so restorative.

Chrissie Ott:
You’re listening to Solving for Joy. I’m your host, Dr. Chrissie Ott, a multi-boarded integrative physician and professional certified life and career coach.
This podcast is about joy—what it means, how we find it, and the creative ways people are solving for it in their own lives. I’m so glad you’re here.

Hello everybody and welcome to today’s episode of the Solving for Joy podcast. I am joined today by my radiant sister-friend, Dr. Shideh Shafie. If you know Shideh, then you are already excited for this episode.

Dr. Shafie is an assistant professor of emergency medicine at Brown University’s Warren Alpert Medical School. She works at the Providence Community Health Center, serving a quarter of the city’s most vulnerable populations. And she runs her own performance coaching practice, where she uses her experience in emergency medicine and operations to help busy professionals build lives that allow them to thrive in both personal and professional spheres.

I am excited to share with you Shideh’s special brand of elegant badassery. We’re going to talk about a lot related to joy today, and we’re centering a practice she’s developed called High-Vibe Sundays. Friend, welcome.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Hi! Thank you. I’m so excited to be here.

Chrissie Ott:
So excited to have you. I’ve been starting conversations by asking about a tiny recent joy. Tell me something that recently brought you joy—big or small.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Okay, this is such a minuscule thing, but it made me so proud of myself. I do some real estate work. One of the tenants texted me: “Our refrigerator light isn’t working, and my garbage disposal isn’t working.” He’s a physician and would be at work all day, so I thought, “Is it the breaker? Is his food going to go bad?” I asked if I could run over and check. He said sure.

I checked the breakers—they were fine. I reset the garbage disposal, so that was working again. It turned out to be just the fridge light. I ordered a new bulb and swapped it in. It was so satisfying to solve a problem I would have called someone for in the past. I’ve built that knowledge over time. Such a small thing, but very joyful.

Chrissie Ott:
I love that—self-sufficiency aligned with your values. Congratulations. And also—naming it as joy. My tiny joy: before we started we danced to Chapel Roan, shifted the energy, and I had a lot of joy in the last three minutes just dancing around with my friend, Shideh.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Lots of layers of joy in there. I loved that too.

Chrissie Ott:
The first time we ever met at the Physician Coaching Summit a few years ago, we started with a dance!

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Dancing is such a powerful way to shift energy, and it’s so easy. My clients have high-pressure jobs—my brand is, “It’s okay to have pressure; let’s figure out what to do with it.” Dancing is an easy way to discharge it, and it doesn’t take much time. It’s very effective for the physiology of stress. It helps release cortisol and adrenaline and brings up joy. Pop in your AirPods, dance for three minutes, done. It also taps your creative centers.

Chrissie Ott:
Totally—efficient and enjoyable. When you move organically without a plan, you experience freedom physically and emotionally; you’re rewiring your brain. Movement is more effective when it’s something we enjoy.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
I have a keynote coming up in Dallas—a big room, lots of people I don’t know. There’s natural anxiety. I’ve planned my day: OrangeTheory in the morning, then a blowout (I feel like I can solve anything with great hair!), and right before I go on, a song to dance to. The chemistry needs to be dealt with. It’s not “self-care” as much as a strategic plan to show up with the best energy and care.

Chrissie Ott:
“Strategic plan” is very Shideh. A strategic plan for your life! One of the things that came up in planning for PCS was High-Vibe Sundays. Share the backstory?

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Sure. There’s another parent at our kids’ school named Damien. We don’t have kids in the same class, but the school has a Commons area with coffee and Wi-Fi. Because of a major bridge construction project in Rhode Island, it’s often better to wait until 9 or 9:30 to head back over the bridge—so people hang out, work, and talk. Over the last couple years Damien and I would talk often. He also coaches—he runs a rewilding program, is very tied to the ocean, and does ocean conservation.

We started talking more about non-dualism. You can see non-dualism in Sikhism (Sikhi) and in thought leaders like Martha Beck and even Brooke Castillo; the Conscious Leadership framework is grounded in a non-dual lens. The idea is that the energy of life—Source, God, the universe—is not separate from us. Watcher consciousness: you are not your thoughts or body; there’s a deeper layer that runs through all things.

Teachers like Michael Singer, Gary Zukav, Joe Dispenza—many point to connecting with that space of infinite power. Kabbalah, Sufism, Christian and Jewish mystics—all in different words. We wanted to create a space for people to experience that consciousness more often. So once a month on a Sunday, we host a simple gathering: Damien leads breathwork; I guide something reflective—like a silent, conscious walk through the garden; then we share a vegetarian meal. There’s no other objective. We just meet that space—together.

There’s talk about vibrational energy: lower-level emotions (fear, shame, jealousy) help us survive, but as we feel safer we can move into higher vibrations like tranquility and peace. Gratitude is the gateway; it’s a trainable, conscious practice that opens the door to serenity. Excitement and even happiness are fleeting. Serenity and peace don’t require as much energy and can be sustained—and meditated in—for long periods. If we can help people touch that space for 10–15 minutes once a month, it’s beautiful. And doing it in community matters—co-regulation lets those with lower energy rise. We believe in transference/counter-transference; co-regulation is powerful.

Chrissie Ott:
I love that it started in co-working at your kids’ school—fated! Non-separateness is lifetime work; our brains love contrast. Training the brain to hold contrast and non-separateness at once is a hat trick. My teacher, Jennifer Wellwood—steeped in yogic and Tibetan traditions—says non-separateness isn’t sameness. We haven’t reduced everything to gray. There’s beauty in distinctness even as non-separateness exists.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Totally. Sameness can be a huge source of suffering—especially for physicians. There’s an unspoken profile of what a “good doctor” should be. No one knows exactly what it is, but everyone thinks they’re not it. We may not be the same, but we share the same source running through us. The desire to be the same—even when you don’t want what others want—creates suffering. Ironically, so many physicians share that same feeling.

Chrissie Ott:
When we have a core universal truth like non-dualism, people spend lifetimes trying to describe it—so many fingers pointing at the moon. I read Gary Zukav’s The Seat of the Soul in the late ’90s; Dan Millman’s The Peaceful Warrior too—those opened the door for me: mindfulness, presence, agency. Gregg Braden’s Walking Between the Worlds comes to mind—he writes about the Dead Sea Scrolls, “zero point,” and how contrast can serve our return to non-duality.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Kabbalists share a similar view. Our job in this life is to evolve the soul—moving closer to living like the Creator. The painful moments are what allow evolution. Another Kabbalistic idea: darkness isn’t the absence of light; it can be too much light for the current vessel. You need to expand your capacity to receive. Imagine overfilling a small cup—the chaos isn’t from water being “bad,” but the vessel being too small. Expanding capacity changes the experience of light.

Chrissie Ott:
You also emphasized community—how different it is from a solo retreat day.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
We’re primates wired for connection. When threatened, primates run to another safe primate, not a hiding spot. Choosing something that’s a little “different,” like connecting to Source in this way, can feel isolating alone. Being a physician who chooses coaching can also trigger judgment from others. It’s important to have evidence that you’re not alone. Community nourishes you—and helps practically with business: referrals, trusted coaches to send friends to, people who understand the framework you’re living.

Chrissie Ott:
Yes—smart, brave, sincere people whose spiritual work touches their professional, social, and family lives. Sharon Stein (badass colorectal surgeon and coach) talked last year about the indoctrination of physicians—the “gang” vibe: blood in, blood out. If you leave, you feel the herd’s judgment. It used to be non-evidence-based, but now we have evidence for physician coaching—burnout, imposter syndrome, occupational well-being. Being with people like you reminds me this isn’t a crazy choice; if it feels right in your body, it’s legitimate.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
And it’s helpful to see the many ways people do it. In the physician-coaching world, some coaches are more famous, but everyone’s business looks different. Group only, 1:1 only, mixed. I ran a retreat this year because I knew someone who did and could help me troubleshoot. Modeling expands what you believe is possible—and you learn from others’ experiments.

Chrissie Ott:
I wouldn’t have this podcast without someone modeling the steps at PCS. Ten months later, here we are. It’s like building a home: some want a high-rise apartment; some a cottage; some a big place in the country. Not better-worse, just fit. Some coach inside institutions; some are entrepreneurs; some coach 10% of their time; some leave clinical practice. Like non-dualism, these choices coexist beautifully.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
And you get to choose—then choose again—until it fits this season. For me, right-dose medicine is two days a week. I love it. I go all-in with my clients and prefer deep 1:1 work, so I keep capacity aligned with my other responsibilities. Later, I may expand. Some of my most influential coaches taught me by how they move in the world, not just what they say. That gives permission.

Chrissie Ott:
I’m feeling the difference between flow and forcing—naming the right size. I’m in a season where coaching is a side dish, not the entrée. Overfilling the plate isn’t always the answer. When I do locums in small doses, I can lavish energy on patients. It feels fun—versus the grind of “next, next, next.”

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Same. Two days a week feels joyful—no dread. The rest of the time is clients and other work I love.

Chrissie Ott:
I hope our friends listening find more of that. And if you want more, come to the Physician Coaching Summit—that’s what we’re into there.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
One thing that gets sticky for physician coaches is the thought: “You’re successful when you no longer practice,” or “when your coaching income matches your physician salary.” Those can be metrics if you want them, but they’re not the only ones. Define your success for a given period or area. Without a definition, you can’t ever feel satisfied.

I sometimes “go off” on the FIRE movement (Financial Independence, Retire Early). For physicians: be financially independent from institutions that won’t care for you—yes. But then what? True satisfaction blends hedonia (pleasure/joy) and eudaimonia (meaning). Our work as physicians is meaningful—even in broken systems. Can you dose it so the toxicity doesn’t break your heart, and you can still have joy?

It’s beautiful to stay in medicine if it serves you—and also beautiful to leave if it doesn’t. My metric isn’t “leave clinical.” It’s: can I practice in a way that supports my values and goals? I have clear lines for when I would leave.

Chrissie Ott:
There was a time I thought leaving clinical was success. I don’t believe that now. I’m not on someone else’s path—I’m trying to be true in this moment. And now what? And now what? You only know the part you’re in and the part you’ve been; the past clarifies with distance.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
I’m proud I found a physician job that’s meaningful, serves a population I love, and lets me be a present mother and run my other work. I like going to work. I do one Saturday a month—recently we had four of us I’d hang with outside the hospital; a colleague brought homemade coffee cake; we saw newborns. It felt sustainable and pleasant. That’s rare, and I’m grateful.

Chrissie Ott:
May it serve and inspire. I’m glad you get to be of service in a way that fills you up.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
Many physicians grieve leaving clinical work; they chose it for a reason. I’m all about financial independence from medical institutions—they’re focused on skimming off the top. But what if you FIRE and then work in a way you like? Create financial independence and then live how you want, with meaningful work in the mix.

Chrissie Ott:
Yes—financial independence, live how you want.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
I kind of live like a retired person—I play tennis two to three times a week—and I integrate that into my life.

Chrissie Ott:
Shideh, I’m so grateful for you—thank you for co-creating and holding space for the Summit, and for being a friend. Much love.

Dr. Shideh Shafie:
I’m so thankful to be part of this space. I’m excited for the Physician Coaching Summit—it’s restorative every year. It’s not a typical conference where you run from session to session; the pace is luxurious, connected. The food, atmosphere, and being together—so lovely. First-time attendees will be blown away that a space like this exists.

Chrissie Ott:
Thank you again to the fabulous and wonderful Dr. Shideh Shafie. This could not have been more fun. I love hearing about High-Vibe Sundays.

Next week, I’ll be joined by Meena Julapalli, M.D., a dermatologist and coach—especially for kids—and a clinician offering fascinating clinical hypnosis. I can’t wait to get into it with Dr. Julapalli.

If you’re a physician coach or physician aligned with coaching, you are invited to join us at the Physician Coaching Summit—two months from now at Civana Wellness Resort & Spa in Carefree, Arizona. Please check out details at www.thephysiciancoachingsummit.com and reach out with any questions. We would love to have you there.

As always, I’m a doctor, but not your doctor. This podcast is for education and connection only. It is not medical advice. Speak with your own clinician about your specific situation if you need support.

Thank you to Kelsey Vaughn, our amazing producer and magic maker; to Su, my partner in everything; and to you. Thank you for being with us—you’re the reason we make this show. May we all continue to find new and high-vibe ways to solve for joy. We’ll see you next time.